CABL Forum - Jokes

> What's the best form of birth control after 50?
> ***Nudity***
>
> ************************************************************
> What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
> ***45 lbs.***
>
> *************************************************************
> What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
> ***45 minutes***
>
> **************************************************************
> How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
> ***None, they just sit there in the dark and bitch***
>
> **************************************************************
> Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive?
> ***Because those men already have boyfriends***
>
> ***************************************************************
> What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
> ***After a year, the dog is still excited to see you***
>
> ****************************************************************
> What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
> ***The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of
> driving***
>
> ****************************************************************
> What do you call a smart blonde?
> ***A golden retriever***
>
> *****************************************************************
> Why does the bride always wear white?
> ***Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the stove and
> refrigerator***
>
> ******************************************************************
> A brunette, a blonde and a redhead are all in third grade. Who has the
> biggest boobs?
> ***The blonde, because she's 18***
>
> ******************************************************************
> What is the quickest way to clear out a men's restroom?
> ***Say, "Nice dick"***
>
> *******************************************************************
> Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
> ***Because they have cotton balls***
>
> *******************************************************************
> What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
> ***"Are you sure it's mine?"***
>
> ******************************************************************
> What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts?
> ***Beer Nuts are $1 and Deer Nuts are always under a buck***
>
> *******************************************************************
> Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
> ***Mace will do that to you***
>
> ********************************************************************
> Why did O.J. Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
> ***Everyone has the same DNA***
>
> ********************************************************************
> Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
> ***Breasts don't have eyes***
>
> *******************************************************************
> What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
> ***A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the
cage,
> along with a recipe***
>
> ********************************************************************
> What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern
fairytale?
> ***The northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." and the southern
> fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this sh**...."

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