The following has apparently been
attributed to State Representative
Mitchell Kaye from GA.
"We, the sensible people of the United States, in an attempt to help
everyone get along, restore some semblance of justice, avoid any more riots,
keep our nation safe, promote positive behavior, and secure the blessings of
debt free liberty to ourselves and our great-great-great-grandchildren,
hereby try one more
time to ordain and establish some common sense guidelines for the terminally
whiny, guilt ridden, delusional, and other liberal, bedwetters. We hold these
truths to be self-evident: that a whole lot of people are confused by the
Bill of Rights and are so dim that they require a Bill of No Rights.
ARTICLE I: You do not have the right to a new car, big screen TV or any
other form of wealth. More power to you if you can legally acquire them, but
no one is guaranteeing anything.
ARTICLE II: You do not have the right to never be offended. This country
is based on freedom, and that means freedom for everyone -- not just you! You may leave the room, turn the channel, express a different opinion, etc., but
the world is full of idiots, and probably always will be.
ARTICLE III: You do not have the right to be free from harm. If you stick a
screwdriver in your eye, learn to be more careful, do not expect the tool
manufacturer to make
you and all your relatives independently wealthy.
ARTICLE IV: You do not have the right to free food and housing. Americans are
the most charitable people to be found, and will gladly help anyone in need,
but we are
quickly growing weary of subsidizing generation after generation of
professional couch potatoes who achieve nothing more than the creation of
another generation of professional couch potatoes.
ARTICLE V: You do not have the right to
free health care. That would be nice,
but from the looks of public housing, we're just not interested in public
health care.
ARTICLE VI: You do not have the right to physically harm other people. If you
kidnap, rape, intentionally maim, or kill someone, don't be surprised if the
rest of
us want to see you fry in the electric chair.
ARTICLE VII: You do not have the right to the possessions of others. If you
rob, cheat or coerce away the goods or services of other citizens, don't be
surprised if the rest of us get together and lock you away in a place where
you still won't have the right to a big screen color TVor a life of leisure.
but from the looks of public housing, we're just not interested in public
health care.
ARTICLE VI: You do not have the right to physically harm other people. If you
kidnap, rape, intentionally maim, or kill someone, don't be surprised if the
rest of
us want to see you fry in the electric chair.
ARTICLE VII: You do not have the right to the possessions of others. If you
rob, cheat or coerce away the goods or services of other citizens, don't be
surprised if the rest of us get together and lock you away in a place where
you still won't have the right to a big screen color TVor a life of leisure.
ARTICLE VIII: You don't have the right
to a job. All of us sure want all of you
to have one, and will gladly help you along in hard times, but we expect you
to take advantage of the opportunities of education and vocational training
laid before you to make yourself useful.
to have one, and will gladly help you along in hard times, but we expect you
to take advantage of the opportunities of education and vocational training
laid before you to make yourself useful.
ARTICLE IX: You do not have the right to happiness. Being an American means
that you have the right to pursue happiness -- which by the way, is a lot
easier if you are
unencumbered by an overabundance of idiotic laws created by those of you who
were confused by the Bill of Rights,"
