Dear Tech Support:
Last year I
upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow
down in the
performance of the flower and jewelry applications that had
operated
flawlessly under the Boyfriend 5.0 system.
In addition, Husband 1.0
un-installed many other valuable programs, such as
Romance 9.9, but installed
undesirable programs such as NFL 7.4, NBA 3.2 and
NHL 4.1.
Conversation
8.0 also no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes
the system. I've
tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no
avail. What can I
do?
Signed,
Desperate
************************************************
Dear
Desperate,
First, keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 was an entertainment
package, while
Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Try to enter the
command C:/I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and install Tears 6.2.
Husband 1.0 should
then automatically run the applications: Guilt 3.3 and
Flowers 7.5.
But
remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to such
background
applications as Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.
Please
remember that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create
Snoring
Loudly.WAV files. DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 or reinstall
another
Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will
crash
Husband 1.0. It could also potentially cause Husband 1.0 to default to
the
program: Girlfriend 9.2, which runs in the background and has been known
to
introduce potentially serious viruses into the Operating System.
In
summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited
memory
and can't learn new applications quickly. You might consider
buying
additional software to enhance his system performance. I
personally
recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Single Malt Scotch 4.5 combined with
such
applications as that old stand-by...Lingerie 6.9 (which has been
credited
with improved performance of his hardware).
Good Luck,
Tech
Support
Later,
