Any City Hall in the USA
"Next."
"Good morning. We want to apply for a marriage license."
"Names?"
"Tim and Jim Jones."
"Jones? Are you related? I see a resemblance."
"Yes, we're brothers."
"Brothers? You can't get married."
"Why not? Aren't you giving marriage licenses to same gender
couples?"
"Yes, thousands. But we haven't had any siblings. That's incest!"
"Incest?" No, we are not gay."
"Not gay? Then why do you want to get married?"
"For the financial benefits, of course. And we do love each other.
Besides, we don't have any other prospects."
"But we're issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples
who've been denied equal protection under the law. If you are
not gay, you can get married to a woman."
"Wait a minute. A gay man has the same right to marry a woman
as I have. But just because I'm straight doesn't mean I want to
marry a woman. I want to marry Jim."
"And I want to marry Tim; are you going to discriminate against
us just because we are not gay?"
"All right, all right. I'll give you your license. Next."
"Hi. We are here to get married."
"Names?"
"John Smith, Jane James, Robert Green, and June Johnson."
"Who wants to marry whom?"
"We all want to marry each other."
"But there are four of you!"
"That's right. You see, we're all bisexual. I love Jane and Robert,
Jane loves me and June, June loves Robert and Jane, and Robert
loves June and me.
All of us getting married together is the only way we can express
our sexual preferences in a marital relationship."
"But we've only been granting licenses to gay and lesbian couples."
"So you're discriminating against bisexuals!"
"No, it's just that...well, the traditional idea of marriage is that it's
just for couples."
"Since when are you standing on tradition?"
"Well, I mean, you have to draw the line somewhere."
"Who says? There's no logical reason to limit marriage to couples.
The more the better. Besides, we demand our rights! The mayor
says the constitution guarantees equal protection under the law. Give
us a marriage license!"
"All right, all right. Next."
"Hello, I'd like a marriage license."
"In what names?"
"David Deets."
"And the other man?"
"That's all. I want to marry myself."
"Marry yourself? What do you mean?"
"Well, my psychiatrist says I have a dual personality, so I want to
marry the two together. Maybe I can file a joint income-tax return."
"That does it! I quit!!
You people are making a mockery of marriage!"
The Mockery
Member #: 61573
Registered: 9/2/2008
Posted:
7392
Name:
jerry
Company:
Unemployed
Occupation:
none
Location:
USA
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